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小编: 301同学,你的屠鸭计划进行得顺利吗?
这一路上,要背单词,翻译句子,练完精听练精读,说完口语又去写作文……每个人都要经历重重考验,克服无数困难。终于接近总分目标了,突然冲出一只小怪兽,它的名字叫“单科不得低于6”。
好多屠鸭勇士们,听力和阅读早7UP了,作文也写了厚厚一摞纸,准备充分走进考场,一出成绩,写作只有5.5。
扎心吗?
为啥要打6分就那么难??
对于雅思写作备考,每个上过考场的战士都能总结出自己的策略,但几乎所有经验都是针对大作文的。
所以普遍现象是Task2论证已经发挥到天花板了,Task1图表却停留在复制粘贴数据的阶段——既然不允许主观臆断随意发挥,那就只好抄数据凑字数喽。
没有哪一种伤害是单方面的,作者对付写一写,考官扣分对付你。这样一来,小作文成了短板,拖了大作文后腿,自然打不上6分。
想要最快拿到6分,就必须消灭短板,填平大小作文质量差异。
1.评分标准帮你定位小作文短板
小作文,看似只要看图写话。这种小学一年级的题型,在雅思中咋就这么难!
看看下面的场景,是不是描述了一个正在写小作文的你:
👉苦恼一:图中数据太多,审题10分钟,还不确定写什么;
👉苦恼二:有想法,但不会描述。整本雅思词书背完,也没找到恰当的词,只好把数据们从图表里搬到作文纸上。
问题很严重——作文内容显得机械重复,上下文难以衔接,体现出的词汇量小,句子结构又单一,考官就只给5分。
内容层面要主次分明,条理清晰,词汇够用,还会混搭句型。
2.剑桥范文帮你明确质量差异
评分标准听起来挺抽象,用一篇C9T3的饼图举例吧:
在描述这两个国家不同年份间的数据变化时,5分选手会这样写:
In Yemen, 15-59 years people will increase to 57.3% in 2050. And 60+ years will increase to 5.7%. In Italy, 15-59 years will decrease to 46.2% and 60+ people will increase to 42.3%.
这就是开门见山的照搬数据,以不变应万变,一整篇作文,都在重复一个套路。这样的句子好像连Siri都会写,让它去考试都能打5分了。
👉要写成这样才是6分(来自剑桥范文):
The projections for 2050 show that the number of people with 15-59 years and 60 years or more will increase in Yemen, reaching 57.3% and 5.7% respectively. In contrast, in Italy, the population with 15-59 years will decrease to 46.2%, while people with 60 years or more will grow to 42.3%.
看出区别了吗?
虽然6分作文也在说数据,但是句子之间有连接词的衔接,表达简练,词汇和句型都不重复,看起来不枯燥。
再用C11T2的饼图,明确一下表达差异吧:
要描述两个年份中,占比最高的语种一直是Spanish, 如果这样写:
Spanish had 30% and it was the highest in 2000. In 2010, it increased to 35% and still was the highest.
虽然数据信息和最高值的概念都出现了,但是因为词汇语法简单重复,也只能是5分。
👉剑桥6分范文这样写:
The biggest percentage had Spanish only with 30% in 2000. However it has increased by 5% and is in 2010 still the highest percentage with 35%.
这个句话的句型并不复杂,在表示上升的动词increase后用介词by连接数据,其他数据用介词with衔接,避免了措辞的重复。
再用C15T1柱图来加深一下印象:
在对比两个城市的相似之处时,5分选手可能这么表达:Sydney has 43.7% and Melbourne has 42.3% and they are similar.
👉6分范文这样写:In Sydney has 43.7 percent of city residents and has almost the same amount as Melbourne which is 42.3 percent.
差距是6分考生会用which从句引出平淡无奇的数据。
这些差异提醒我们,要提升小作文分数,就要重视数据的表达方式。要用好数据,并且要好好用数据,就能将短板升级成强项。
3.刻意练习,哪里短板补哪里
这些道理谁都懂,但是我真的做不到啊!
别急,有问题,就一定会有解决方案。既然5分与6分的差异,是我们利用范文对比得出的。那就把剑桥书后的考官范文安排上,精读几篇,提炼一些精彩词汇和句型,通过仿写来升级自己写的大白话。
考官写的,你学会了,就成了你的,不香吗?
最初可以从词汇入手,先丢掉最最基础的be动词+数据,或者increase/decrease+数据的表达方式。
先看个例句:
(剑七-Test4)But by 2000 nuclear power, which was not used at all in Australia, had developed into the main source, producing almost 75% of electricity, at 126 units.
(剑八-Test2) Teachers’ pay remained the biggest cost, reaching 50% of total spending in 1991 and ending at 45% in 2001.
范文中的producing, reaching, 还有ending at, 都可以替代is导入数据。
别人家的句型到手了,下一步是让它为自己的作文增光添彩。
还记得上面那个5分句子吗,In Yemen, 15-59 years people will increase to 57.3% in 2050. And 60+ years will increase to 5.7%. In Italy, 15-59 years will decrease to 46.2% and 60+ people will increase to 42.3%.
模仿考官的写法试试看:In Yemen, 15-59 years people will increase, reaching 57.3% of total population in 2050.
除了V-ing形式,介词with表示伴随,这个大家都知道,它也可以用来导入数据,比如:
(剑八-Test1) The impact of this on Oceania and North America was minimal, with only 1.7% and 0.2% of land affected respectively.
(剑四-Test1) However, those consisting of only one parent or a single adult had almost double this proportion of poor people, with 21% and 19% respectively.
还用上面那个5分句子,加入with升级后:Both 15-59 years and 60+ years in Yemen will increase, with 57.3% and 5.7% respectively.
掌握了这些词汇之后,小学老师教的there be句型,也可以在描述数据时表示趋势或存在,考官自己也在用:
(剑四-Test2) There is a sharp rise in the next hour to reach its maximum before collapsing again to a lower level by the end of the day.
(剑十三-Test2) In 2011, there was a slight increase in rented households and it was up to 38%.
换一个5分句子,用there be句型加持一下:
整容前:Sydney has 43.7% and Melbourne has 42.3% and they are similar.
整容后:There is a similar trend in both Sydney and Melbourne.
嫌弃there be没有技术含量吗?
那些在大作文中已经实践得很熟练的句型,比如定语从句,也可以用来导入数据:
(剑三-Test4) In March, 1993United Stats had seven percent of their workforce which might not seen disastrous until compared with Japan, where 2.5% were unemployed.
(剑三-Test4) Noticeably, the highest divorce rate was in 1980, when about 1.4million divorces attracted the attention.
再挑一个5分句子:Spanish had 30% and it was the highest in 2000. In 2010, it increased to 35% and still was the highest.
加入定语从句后的样子:Spanish had 30% in 2000 and 35% in2010, which remained the highest in both years.
最后,同样是大作文中的流量明星,形式主语从句,比如It is interesting to note that…或者It is noticeable that…可以用来强调特殊的细节和最大值等信息:
(剑五-Test2) It is also interesting to note that almost all showed a decrease in 1994 in amount of goods transported except for the pipeline, which actually peaked in that year.
(剑四-Test1)It is noticeable that for both types of household with children, a higher than average proportion were living in poverty at this time.
来对比一下Spanish had 30% and it was the highest in 2000. In 2010, it increased to 35% and still was the highest.
与加入从句后的表达:It is noticeable that the percentage of Spanish had remained the highest in both years.
总结
总结一下,写作突破6分,需要充足的耐心与细心,更需要关注评分标准,对大小作文给予同等重视。
大作文可以靠议论的深度与广度拿高分,也可以通过丰富的词汇和句型来提分,小作文主要靠精确多变的描述数据来体现语言能力。
要把数据写得精彩,剑桥范文是个好东西。先精读提炼词汇句型,再仿写句子巩固疗效,做到大小作文一碗水端平。
搬运数据等于搬砖,没有功劳只有苦劳,现在开始升级数据表达,祝你早日成为6分好青年!